[Chicks]

SAN FRANCISCO (The Borowitz Report)—His net worth plummeting after the explosion of SpaceX’s Starship, Elon Musk has fallen below Clarence Thomas on the list of the world’s richest people.

Musk now finds himself lumped in with others who are less wealthy than Thomas, including Jeff Bezos, Warren Buffett, and the Sultan of Brunei.

Speaking to reporters, Musk was “livid” at being surpassed by Thomas, who, he complained, has done “almost nothing” to earn his fortune.

“If Clarence wants eight billion dollars, all he has to do is climb aboard some dude’s yacht,” Musk said. “I have to persuade a billion idiots to buy a blue check mark.”