 |
| Register | FAQ | Members List | Calendar | Today's Posts | Search |
|
#81
05-07-2010, 01:29 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Well I'll be jiggered - Obama HAS a personality? What, he's kept it locked in the White House bunker?
"I wasn't sure I should actually come tonight. Biden talked me into it. He leaned over to me and said, 'Mr. President, this is no ordinary dinner, this is a big BLEEP-ing meal.'" "It's been quite a year since I've spoken here last. Lots of ups, lots of downs, except for my approval ratings, which have just gone down. But that's politics, it doesn't bother me. Besides, I happen to know that my approval ratings are still very high in the country of my birth." "Though I am glad that the only person whose ratings fell more than mine last year is here tonight. Great to see you Jay. I'm also glad that I'm speaking first. We've all seen what happens when somebody takes the time slot after Leno's." "There a few things in life harder to find and more important to keep than love. Well, love and a birth certificate." I'd hate to be Pres, I think. Pete
__________________
“How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.” 
|
|
#82
05-14-2010, 02:33 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
"Good news from the world of publishing. Sarah Palin, former governor of Alaska, has a new book coming out this fall. The warning came from an alert T-shirt vendor." –David Letterman
"Now, according to The Wall Street Journal, a new study says a parent should not be alarmed if their child tells a lie. They say it's a natural part of development and there are three phases — adolescent lying, young adult lying, and of course, oil executive lying. That is the biggest." –Jay Leno "BP, Transocean and Halliburton are blaming each other for the Gulf of Mexico oil spill. They are all right." –Jay Leno "These people make Goldman Sachs look responsible, don't they?" –Jay Leno "BP is going to try to stop the leak by pushing garbage into it. Oh, yeah, they haven't screwed up the gulf enough, let's fill it with garbage, too." –Jay Leno "Well, the latest plan was to cover the leak with another concrete dome, a smaller one called a top hat. Who came up with this idea, Mr. Moneybags, from the Monopoly game? What's next, the giant thimble?" –Jay Leno "Well, the Senate today voted to toughen standards for home loans. Under these new standards, lenders would have to verify that borrowers can repay the loan. Let's just hope China doesn't adopt this." –Jay Leno [OUCH!] "Sarah Palin has a new book coming out called 'America by Heart: Reflections on Family, Faith and Flag.' Coincidentally, Faith and Flag are the names Palin picked out if she ever has twins." –Jimmy Fallon "Police in Cairo have detained an American man who arrived on a flight from JFK with two handguns, 250 bullets, swords, daggers and knives in his luggage. When they heard this, JFK screeners were like, 'Sure he had all these things, but here's what he didn't have — bottled water or nail clippers.'" –Jimmy Fallon "Prison inmates in Louisiana are now pitching in to clean up the Gulf Coast oil spill. At this point, the solutions have been dump chemicals in the ocean, shoot a bunch of garbage under water and release prisoners. If none of that works, they're going to have Al Qaeda come take a look at it." –Jimmy Fallon Pete
__________________
“How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.”
|
|
#83
05-14-2010, 06:10 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
Chas
|
|
#84
05-17-2010, 09:57 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
Pete
__________________
“How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.”
|
|
#85
05-17-2010, 10:41 AM
|
|||
|
|||
|
And to think, at one stage in my life, I REALLY wanted one of those Tres Kewl "Zero Halliburton" brief cases...Had absolutely no use whatsoever for it, but still...Well, I saw a show once where some assassin had fitted a full-auto Uzi in one, he just walked up to his target, pulled the handle a little, & Whoopee ! Hehehehehehe... Yeah, I know THAT "Halliburton" has nothin' to do w/the cases, the case people just get tarred by association.
|
|
#86
05-21-2010, 02:04 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Confucious say: he that go to bed with ichy butt wake up with smelly fingers.
Highbow stuff.  Next up, some timely Jimmy Buffet:
__________________
“How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.”
|
|
#87
05-21-2010, 03:01 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Thanks Pete for starting this thread and keeping it going. We all need comic relief - what with the world on the brink of armageddon. I have a lot of respect for political cartoon writers. Their ability to boil everything down to its essence to make a point astounds me. It is clearly a skill I don't have. That was a great cartoon. Do you agree with it's point, or just think that it was well made?
Regards, D-Ray
__________________
Then I'll get on my knees and pray, We won't get fooled again; Don't get fooled again
|
|
#88
05-21-2010, 03:18 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Yes I absolutely agree :yes: we use oil and complain about it. Typical Americans
 But I think "what with the world on the brink of armageddon." is a LOT funnier than that cartoon! I trust you meant it so?
__________________
“How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.”
|
|
#89
05-21-2010, 03:37 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
Damn Colts, too expensive to shoot!!! Chas
|
|
#90
05-21-2010, 03:52 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
Regards, D-Ray
__________________
Then I'll get on my knees and pray, We won't get fooled again; Don't get fooled again
|
 |
«
Previous Thread
|
Next Thread
»
Linear Mode
|
|
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:57 PM.